Update

Well I know its been a while, but wow. The Surgery in 2012 was suppose to be a good fix, and it was for a while. The Melody Valve lasted almost a yr. and a half. In the Summer of 2013 I noticed my body was slowing down, changing, and not for the better. It was a stressful time of year. in July I went to the cardiologist and they noticed things weren't good but wanted to keep an eye on things. While I was dealing with quitting one job and finding another with health benefits, stress didn't help, I went in in September and they noticed things were changing still and planned for an ultrasound in November. That ultrasound and an MRI told them that what I was feeling was actually happening. my Melody Valve had calcified. Blood was barely getting through my heart. They told me I needed Open Heart Surgery immediately. Surgery was Scheduled for Jan 21 2014. I told my new boss, had health insurance, and they even agreed to keep me covered while I was out for surgery and recovery. Leading up to the surgery I was fine, I talked to the Dr, I knew what was going to happen. its not like it was new for me... it being my 5th heart surgery. I worked up until the day before. I was ok with everything, I talked it through with B and answered any questions he had. he seemed ok... a little scared but ok about everything. The Morning of the Surgery we got to the hospital we got there first. Ramona came a bit after and visited me in the pre-op room. the whole family took turns. I was ok I was terrified but I was holding it together. Then I got a text from B that he was there in the waiting room, and when he appeared around the curtain i burst into tears. I was relived, happy, feeling loved and terrified all at once. He came and was there for me. He even took the week off of work. He was there when I was wheeled into the Operating room. I was told later that a lot of family came. My surgery took a little longer than planned, which scared them a little. My aunt told me how precious B was and how relived he was when the Dr came in the room. Once I woke up he was there.. he was there even for his birthday. My stay in the hospital was fairly nice, i got xrays every day and had to take walks immediately to get me uo and moving. i was sick and in pain and not eating and throwing up. I had drainage tubes connected to me most of the days i was there and i remember the pain of them taking them out. I was discharged from the hospital January 29th. I took my own stitches out a few weeks later once they started to hurt and change colors. That's not even the best part. The Best part is that I no longer have an awkward bump on my scar, i have a new flat scar, that healed very well. I also have a brand new heart beat. A REGULAR HEART BEAT! for the first time ever! every once in a while it gets a bit wonky but its for minutes not yrs. Im still building up energy but i feel so much better. Im just hoping this one holds.

cardiologist trip this week

Wednesday I finally got to meet with the specialist. it went better than i thought it would. they only had to take an ecg test to see how bad my  heart has gotten. with that test and the charts from my last tests in april and how bad my body is doing physically they decided surgery in in the near future.. they are hoping by september.
they are going to attempt cathater surgery first and if they cant do it they will go for open heart. now all i have to do is wait for the surgeon to call and pick a day. i am soo ready, my heart has begun to effect my sleep. im waking up multiple times a night with my heart pounding  and its driving me crazy. the vein in my neck has been throbbing for the last 6 monnths and is only getting more frequent. i usedto go days or weeks in between feeling any pain or pounding and flutters. now its daily, its hourly. i am always feeling it everywhere. it is wearing me out, its breaking me down.. im ready for surgery to happen. ready for something to be fixed.

Meting with the specialist!

So I met with my new cardiologist and let's face it he is awesome and way better at telling me things ad showing me what I never knewabout my heart. He is so good he is sending me to the UW Medical center to see a specialist because he actually believes me when I say things are getting worse. I have an appointment on july 11th to meet with the specialist. Can't wait!

Well lately with so much stress my chest pains have returned.  Yes there have bee a few minor ones but nothing note worthy.  I learned that my cardiologist retired so I am still waiting to hear back as to who my new one will be while in the mean time here I am in pain with no one to turn to..

Update

So lately I have been having pains but nothing horrible. I recently learned that my cardiologist is retireing. This will be my third cardiologist to retire..  its frustrating. I hate the process of getting used to a new dr.. its annoying going through all the info and tests again.

Feeling off today. Big pressure in my chest that has been there for over an hour. Took some tylonol but its not helping

Had a super sharp pain. Only lasted a few seconds but the pain kinda lingered for a bit after it was more of an aggravation than pain after the effect

my heart has been fluttering and pounding but nothing painful, just seems to be slowing down..

So heart and chest pains are still there but not as bad lately..

Sharp pain just to the left under sternum. Very uncomfortable. Lasting atleast 10 minutes. Stretching doesn't work. Feels deep in

Having a lot of muscular pain today in the chest. Nothing seems to be helping it

Ow. Pain inside close to the back. Plus uncomfortable pressure.

Off to my MRI at UWMedical Center. I was ok but now I kinda want to throw up and cry. We haven't even reached Seattle yet. Stupid nerves.

Every day he breaks my heart a little bit more and more. can the monitor sense that? can it hear my heart breaking bit by bit?

my heart has been pounding and fluttering basically for the last 3 hours. i have pushed the button twice durring the most intense times but i cant exactly just hold it for hours upon end.. its the fluttering that is throwing off my breathing and everything. hope it dies down, i want to walk home tonight.

I wore a shirt that exposed my wires at work today. moms noticed and asked about it and honestly i was ok with talking about it. today i was ok about it. later i dont know.. someitmes thinking about it makes me want to cry.

so i have had the monitor a few days now and have had to call in a few transmissions sofar. almost made it a day without pressing the button but then i got short of breath and my heart started pounding while just sitting still. it should do that but its been happening alot lately.

Heart monitor

I got my heart monitor today.. i have to press a button whenever there is a pain or anything that feels off. then i have to call in to a receptionist, set my phone on the device and press a button. nto exactly convenient for my work schedule. i have to wear it for 30 days

Been crying tonight emotionally and physically my heart is done for the night... Perhaps we will try living again tomorrow :(

My hearts pounding and skipping so bad I kinda want to throw up. Its amazing what nerves can do to you